photo-16     It is a long time since I wrote a blog; not because I got lazy but because I was finding the news so depressing and ‘good news’ news stories seemed to be harder and harder to come by. And the blog was never supposed to be a diary of my life. Hence the break. However, I had a revelation today so this is going to be about me. Sorry. You don’t have to read any further if you don’t wish; I totally understand. For those who wish to continue, please read on.

As one or two of you maybe aware, I took up CrossFit, just over a year ago and despite absolutely loathing the coaches, and myself, at times as I struggled through workouts, I have enjoyed every minute. And no, that’s not a contradiction. It is possible to experience both emotions about the same events/moments.

So, my revelation tonight came as I was walking upside down backwards up the wall for the 10th and final time in the WOD. I walked all the way in, totally confident in my ability to get my belly and chest to touch the wall before descending again.

I have had a good week all round and especially in my progress in my strength training this week. For only the second time ever, I managed to front squat 130lb three times, I rowed my fastest ever 2km, and I hit new PRs for my sumo deadlift and push press. Today, my hope was to be able to conquer the 95lb clean cluster – two slightly different lifts at 95lb. I have, in the past, managed the first half of the cluster, but always failed on the second. And recently, I haven’t even been able to get the first half. So I was full of hope … until I lifted the bar for the first time and …. failed. Oh bugger. And no matter how hard I tried and how patient Anna was in coaching me, I just couldn’t get it. I felt soooo deflated, such a failure. I know I am strong enough to lift this weight but …..

So there I was, this evening, walking backwards on my hands with my feet in the air and it suddenly struck me – what a bozo I am! Just a mere 5 or 6 months ago, I dreaded seeing ‘wall walks’ in the workout. I struggled to get to a 45 degree angle never mind getting my belly to touch the wall. And now hardly thinking about the movement at all, I was just focused on getting finished as quickly as possible.

So even though I still can’t get that darn bar up with 95lb on it, I can do a whole lot of other movements I couldn’t do this time last year. There is progress, I am stronger, I am more confident, I love rope climbs and I am beginning to not dread double unders, I get to workout with my best friend, Paul, and I have met and get to mingle with a great community.

I guess if there is a moral to this tale it would be, even if you think things are going badly and really ‘suck’, take a moment to reflect. You might surprise yourself and find that there really have been improvements and that you just have to shift your focus a little to the side to see around the bad stuff.

If you made it to this point, thanks for reading.

Have a great weekend.

Never doubt yourself.

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